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post #1 of (permalink) Old 02-02-2001, 04:24 PM
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OT-This reminds me of....

a couple of guys on the board . No offence intended !

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are camping in the desert, set up their tent and
>are asleep. Some hours later, The Lone Ranger wakes his faithful
>friend."Tonto, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
>Tonto replies, "Me see millions of stars."
>"What does that tell you?" ask The Lone Ranger.
>Tonto ponders for a minute.
>"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies
>and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that
>Saturn
>is in Leo.
>Time wise, it appears to be approximately a
>quarter past three.
>
>Theologically, it's evident the Great Spirit is all
>powerful and we are small and insignificant.
>
>Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What it
>tell you, Kemo Sabi?"
>The Lone Ranger is silent for a moment, then speaks.
>"Tonto, you Dumb Ass, someone has stolen our tent."

Who's got more jokes ? ! ! !




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post #2 of (permalink) Old 02-02-2001, 04:47 PM
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Re: OT-This reminds me of....

I was just sent that in my e-mail! I thought it was funny [img]/wwwthreads_images/icons/smile.gif[/img] I've got one, its kinda long but still it is all about us!
Here it is:
Ways to tell if you are a hardcore wheeler....

Signs that you're a hardcore Fourwheeler:

- You find that you need a new house because you've outgrown your
garage and
the neighbors are threatening violence if you park one more vehicle on
the
street or in the front yard.

- The requirements you give your real estate agent are (in order of
importance):
1) 8 car climate controlled garage with an attached shop, 8' high
doors.
(I'll take the 12' upgrade please...)
2) Outside parking for 6 cars, a motorhome, a crew cab dualie, a
28'enclosed
trailer and a 34' 5th wheel.
3) 3 phase 220V outlets in the garage for your welder.
4) A grease pit.
5) Convenient to a hazardous waste disposal site.
6) Deaf neighbors.
7) Across the street from a paint and body shop.
8) Some sort of house with a working toilet and shower on the property
somewhere -or- hookups for the motorhome

-Your email address refers to your truck rather than to you.

- You buy new parts because you don't know where you put the spares.

- You're looking for a tow vehicle and still haven't bought furniture
for
your house!

- You measure all family acquisitions in terms of the number of parts
that
could have been purchased.

- You look at the purchase of tools as a long term investment.

- Your garage holds more vehicles than your house has bedrooms.

- You have enough spare parts to build another truck.

- You have truck parts in your cubicle at work.

- Your Christmas list begins with another set of BFG MTs and E-Z Locker
and
your 'significant other' knows what they are

- After your answer to "What did you do this weekend?" the next
question is
always: "And you do this for fun? Right?"

- You have a separate drawer for 'garage clothes'.

- People know you by your "off"s". "Oh, you are the one stuck in the
mud at
Fishing Creek last weekend!"

- You talk to other cars on the road, calling them by the
manufacturer's
name.

- Your criteria for selecting a significant other include auto repair
skills. Air tools optional.

- You plan your wedding around the club schedule.

- You astound the clerk at Sears by bringing in a snapped breaker bar
every
other week or so.

- You give out 4wheel Parts Wholesalers number when a friend asks for
the
best hardware store.

- You hate long distance driving, but you will gladly drive 800 miles
to the
trail.

- You save broken car parts as " momentos".

- You know the exact story behind every one! (see above)

- You would choose a rollbar over air conditioning if it were an
option.

- Your idea of a good time is sitting around figuring out gear ratios
and
the ideal crawl ratio for given situations.

- When someone refers to "The Good Book", you think of "The SAMURAI Owners
Bible"

- You own five Trucks and only one of them is street legal.

- There's a poster of Moab up on the wall next to the family portraits.

- Your video collection contains more wheelin videos then regular
videos.

- Your friends call to tell you they found another way into the woods
rather
then to see how your doing.

- Your refer to "Friends" by the type of truck they drive rather than
names.

- You filled out the Top Truck Challenge Voting card but threw away the
Census 2000 forms.

- 90% of you work e-mail is wheelin related

- You keep trying to coerce your significant other to allow you to
remove
the doors on the minivan.

- You refer to the local construction site as "The testing ground".

- You can remember how to get to every trail you've been on but get
lost
going to your in-laws.

- "The Big Question" refers to Bogger or TSL.

- When someone says someone is Biased you immediately think of tires.

- Your truck no longer fits in the garage.

- Your truck has gone to supermodel status and doesn't leave the garage
for
any trail less than a 4+.

- Your daily driver is considered a mild trail rig.

- Drivers behind you can see the car in front of you, under the truck.

- The term "Open with Attitude" is tattooed on you, or your thinking
about
it.

- You base your next vehicle purchase on it's crawl ratio and whats
available for it in the aftermarket.

- People see pictures of your truck flexed out and ask "Is it broken?".
-
Brian should like this one...

- You stopped washing your truck cause it shows off the scratches.

- Your boss asks you not to bring the truck to work anymore because it
won't
fit in the parking garage without the antenna scraping the ceiling.

- You've actually replaced a flourecent light in the parking garage
cause
your antenna hit it.

- You club web site is your homepage.

- You are in search of a house that borders state forest and refuse to
buy
anything that's not even remotely close to it.

- You'll drop a couple grand on new axles but the kitchen sink still
leaks.

- The vacation pictures are all off-road.

- You ALLWAYS have your drinks on the rocks!

- You look at an open are in the woods and can determine the best line.

- You base your social class on your recent RTI score rather than how
much
money you make.

- Working on your truck is considered relaxation.

- Everytime you see a lowered truck you wanna get out and bitch slap
the
driver.

- You look at other cars and think to yourself "I can crawl over that".

- You consider Rubicon as the holy land.

- Tellico no longer scares you.

- You carry more parts to the trail then home.

- You've installed or though about installing a lift on the lawn mower.

- You consider anything without 4wd-Useless.

- Your ideal vehicle is a Unimog.

- Your truck cost as much as an italian sports car.

- When someone mentions "Xtreme" your eyes light up!

- Motivation invloves someone saying "you can't make it".

- It's not considered a good trail ride if nothing breaks! (or gets
stuck)


And the #1 Sign you're a hardcore wheeler:

You drive by a lifted truck and stare at it, your wife / S.O. slaps you
and
says stop staring at her, you say who?, I was staring at the truck and
she
says what truck





<font color=blue>Brian</font color=blue> [img]/wwwthreads_images/icons/cool.gif[/img] <font color=blue>THE ULTIMATE ZUK</font color=blue>
http://www.geocities.com/brianconrad1/
Zuk Jr. is offline  
post #3 of (permalink) Old 02-03-2001, 08:50 AM
mike shannon
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Re: OT-This reminds me of....

damn have you been following me around for a month. boy that hits home real hard. at my house at this moment a have 1 dodge 3/4 ton 4x4 diesel,one crew cab dually [tow rig], 24' wells cargo trailer,2 samurais,1 rx7[soon to be a zuk moter and trans],3/4 ton suburban[old tow rig],1 tracker[wifes daily driver],84 chevy4x4[friends],and my daily driver is a 85 sr5 toy 4 runner on 31s, o yea 23' supra ski boat and a 20' taylor sj jet boat. and i have to pick up a 88 land cruiser today. and i have a 86 landcruiser that i am hiding at work. plus a cucv ambulance and a 78 bronco at my buddies shop plus another rx7. forgot about the 85 crew cab that is a parts rig at my buddies shop. and one of the main reasons i bought my house is that it backs up to the knox ranch which is six sections. o forgot the family vacations are going back to colorado and moab this year. later mike

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post #4 of (permalink) Old 02-03-2001, 09:48 AM
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Re: OT-This reminds me of....

Yeah , but what about bitch slappin' lo riders tho ?


post #5 of (permalink) Old 02-03-2001, 10:24 AM
mike shannon
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Re: OT-This reminds me of....

oops i forgot about that part but yes.

88.5ht,two87s,88.5 spoa,33X12.50,5.12 f&r,rock cage,4.16 T case
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