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post #1 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 08:44 AM Thread Starter
 
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UPDATE Need some prayers and spiritual advice

My father in law - who is a VERY good person - is dying a slow and agonizing death as a result of failing health. He's only 59 but he has diabetes, full kidney failure, was in a bad car accident about a year ago which has left him permanently disabled and he recently broke his hip. He announced yesterday that he's not going to go back to dialysis which means he'll most likely die within the week. He's in a LOT of pain physically, mentally and spiritually. Since dialysis is a volunteer treatment we cannot force him to go (nor do we wish to).

We're honoring his wishes by letting him pass with the dignity he still has. My kids love him a LOT and we're a close family. I haven't told them yet what's going on but we're taking them to see him today. I don't know how to tell them what's happening. I've never lost someone so close to me and I don't know what to do...

Thanks, I just needed somewhere to vent.....
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post #2 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 09:12 AM
 
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

Our thoughts are with you and your family. Try to keep focused on the happy times. It's better for you and for him.

For your children, Explain to them that it is something that will come when it is time. Depending on their ages, telling them that it is his decision may not be needed at this time. Just don't underestimate their ability to understand. For some 6-8 is not too young. We lost great grandma recently and I was surprised how well they took it. Not indifferent mind you, but they have an appreciation for these things that belie their ages (7, 12, and 14).

With deepest sympathy, Wayne Sisk

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post #3 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 09:34 AM
 
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

I just lost my step brother and good frind the same way last week. He had espicealy suffered tremendesly dering the last year . He made the choice to go off dialasis and let god's will be done and to let nature take it's way. He made shure he had made his peace with God and died very pecfully !! HE Is very much missed. There is never an easy way for the family to except such a choice , ony to except it as the choice of the loved one and to relize that life for that person without at least some Quality is not life at all!
Our prayers are with you all Larry
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post #4 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 10:32 AM
 
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

Pauly- My heart goes out to you and your family. 59 is very yound in the grand scheme of things, and i understand your feelings... as I too have not lost anyone close to me, still having both sets of grandparents alive.
I don't know what to tell you about the children... but i remember when my Great Grandma passed on when I was a child that people kept reminding me that she had lived a good life filled with happiness and love. Though his passing will be a hard road for the rest of you... try to instill that in your children... Remember... god only takes the good ones.
Love to you and Ren
Rae
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post #5 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 06:39 PM Thread Starter
 
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

Well, after a day with the kids, some cupcakes and a nice bouquet of flowers he's decided to pursue other options. He's not saying that he won't go off dialysis in the future but he's decided that it's not time to go.

Needless to say, I'm happy about his decision and I'll still support him in whatever he chooses.
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post #6 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 06:41 PM
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Re: UPDATE Need some prayers and spiritual advice

howdy,
i will pray for him and count my rosery. best for luck and god speed.
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post #7 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 06:50 PM
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

Amazing what cupcakes will do to a person.......I'm happy for you all that he has dicided to stay for a while!
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post #8 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 07:05 PM
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

Happy to hear the news. I think the grandkids play a big role. My Dad turned 81 this year and my Mom will be 78 and I swear they are still here because of the grandkids. Prayers and best wishes. Jim
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post #9 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 07:54 PM
 
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Re: UPDATE Need some prayers and spiritual advice

make sure you explain it clearly. it will be ok

aleast everyone will be able to say goodbye and that they love him

take to time to let the kids ask questions i will make it easier in the long run trust me

if you need something just drop me a line or call me 678-468-8911 i would prefer 7am to 9pm but if need be anytime you will just have to call it a couple of times at night to wake me
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post #10 of (permalink) Old 08-25-2002, 08:19 PM
 
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Re: Need some prayers and spiritual advice....

Praise God. Sometimes prayers and kids can do wonders for a persons will to live.I am so very happy for your family.
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